I cannot believe I have not written since October. So many things have changed but, yet some much is unchanged. My dear friend Jacqueline was my friend and peer at the shelter I work at, died suddenly December 28, 2016. We assume it was a massive heart attack, she died in her sleep. I miss my friend very much and I think about her often still. I know as I get older, I will be faced with death more frequently.
At the same time I have life all around me. My daughter Racheal is due to give birth to her first child this month. We celebrated this new child yesterday with a baby shower/party with family and friends.
It was such a blessing to co-host with my first husband and his partner at their home. I never understand when parents separate, how they cannot put the needs of their children first an d do their best to be amicable at least. My sister and her first husband were a power of example when they separated, they remained friends and still get together with their spouses. I knew that this is the way I wanted to exist and for many reasons it took a few years to get to this point but the past decade has been healthy and for the most part enjoyable. We are different people and different lifestyles but, I know that when you have spent many years together and shared five children, there was lots of love. Where does the love go? I know love doesn't disappear it just shifts and reshapes but, it's there. I am very fortunate that my partner and love is open minded, secure in our relationship and has always been able to know that it's best for the children to have this open and cohesive parenting and he is happy to be part of this big extended family that originated with me and my first husband and he and many others have joined in along the way. Our son, instead of being left out of family functions with all his brothers and sisters, is included and part of. Taking the high road and remembering the love instead of the resentments is better for everyone. I wish joy, love and abundance for him and his partner.
Now my life has been very busy, I am still in that new job and have been working 35 plus hours at the shelter. 65 hours a week has become the norm, and that needs to change. I am considering my options. I am trying to watch for signs and where I'm being divinely led and I believe I'm on the right path. I'm putting some things out there and being patient as possible. I trust that my divine creator will guide me to where I am suppose to be, if I listen and trust.
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| Racheal with me and my brother and sister |
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| Daughter Sam granddaughter Lydi and niece McKenna having fun |
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| Me, my brother Dale my children's step mom Pam and my sister Linda |
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| My first husband Ken, brother Dale and brother in law Mike |
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