Peace, Serenity and Joy-March 28, 2012

Coming to the end of the semester and I feel comfortable with where I am at. I have worked hard and gotten good marks so far and feel well prepared going into the last few weeks. I have also been doing quite a bit of service work in my 12 step program, it is bringing me contentment in my own recovery as well. "You have to give it away to keep it" is a true statement if I ever heard one. I am also back to exercising. Getting to the gym 4-5 days a week, and I feel great. I feel like I am caring for mind body and soul right now. Not everything in life is perfect by any stretch, attempting to stay positive about finances, or lack of them. I know it will all fall into place as it needs to. I am so blessed with abundance in many ways. I have an amazing family although it is difficult to maintain strong relationships in the midst of constant stress and not everyone around me has a program of recovery to work with. I am learning and growing every day, and I know that I can only control one person, just me.

Spring beautiful spring-March 16, 2012

My goodness, it is such a beautiful spring day, although spring is officially a few days away yet we have enjoyed temperatures in the high teens and 20's this week and for the week ahead as well. I was out for a bike ride today. I am working on a self care plan. It has been a difficult few months, I have struggled with a heavy, unmotivated, depressed kind of feeling off and on for a few months. It was worst about six weeks ago, and it's slowly lifted and I feel much more like my old self the past few weeks. I have decided I need to get healthier. Including eating better and exercising regularily, additionally getting more involved in my 12 step program and the people in it.

School is going well, and my new goal is to finish with a 90% overall average. A high goal to be sure, but I can do it. I have Tuesday's off now and most Friday's so it's been more managable lately. It is the March Break and hubby Will and Christian are at the sportsmans show today. I do love my solitude, it feels like the house always has someone in it, that I'm savouring the alone time. Not that I don't love spending time with my family. I just need the solitude to recharge my battery sometimes. It's been a tough year in many ways and just because we get older, doesn't mean everything gets easy with relationships. It's still constant work and some day's I am up for the challenge more than other days. Today is ok though. I am going to the A.A. Ontario conference with some dear friends and I am looking forward to a few days of fellowship and connecting with people who are just like me. I am looking forward to watching the blooms open up and seeing life growing outside my window. Speaking of which I am to be a Grammy again in October and I am thrilled.  My son came over with my grandson last week-end, since the Momma to be is quite sick with morning sickness and mentioned me being the doula. My heart is full.  I got the pleasure of picking up Jack last week to have over for the afternoon. He is so much fun! Picture of my youngest grandson Jack. 15 months.