Today is the 1 year anniversary of when my Mom died. I am having a challenging time today and feel like I am reliving much of last year. I was so tired last night and slept for 9 hours, waking at 10am this morning but, wanting to go back to sleep, got up instead. The very first thing I thought I when I saw the time was, this time last year I was walking into Moms room and saw how sick she looked and she told me I should call people if they wanted to come before she died. I immediately got on the phone to my sister in B.C. and she rearranged her flights to come that day Wednesday instead of the next day. I tried to get hold of my brother and could not. I left messages for him everywhere I could think to but he was doing some chores with a friend, getting wood or something to or from the cabin. My daughter Racheal arrived with a basket of food and snacks, then one by one my children arrived. My daughter in law brought the two youngest grandchildren in and then as evening drew, Mom's agitation grew to calmness. I slipped my arm around her head and placed my other arm across her chest and placed my head down with hers as she passed into whatever comes next. I think she had left already but her body died around 8:50pm. Every segment of time today has a memory associated with it. I have just given into the day as it is and know I must feel what I feel or it will just come up later. I turned down a work shift since I thought I should just be in this day. I went and picked up two perennial plants today and planted them to honor my Moms memory.
Yesterday I went with my sweet friend Christine from work. We got our noses pierced. Mom would have hated it. That's the moving on part
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| Christine and I right after our nose piercing |
Life was meant to be lived and Mom knew that and would want everyone to carry on and live full lives. Tomorrow will come soon enough and then 1 year will be passed. Things change and time moves on. Anusha left 2 weeks ago and went back to India. So our house is changing and shrinking again. One thing for sure in life, change is constant.
