Miracle of Birth-May 20, 2011

What a week! The May long week-end is upon us now. My last week-end that is not crazy busy until after the wedding. I've been working so hard, and this psyc course is so demanding, I've feeling a bit overwhelmed today. I picked my Grandchild Cassandra up at school sick yesterday, and I thought I was going to have the house to myself to get all this school work done, but it's been one interuption after another. 2 guys at the door trying to sell both lawn care and driveway sealing, and they both had trouble with their speech. I daresay they might have had some trouble with their frontal lobe, in Broca's area which plays an important role in the production of speech. I know...too much studying. However I'm doing pretty well. My first quiz did not go well, only 66% and then a 76% and yesterday a 91%, but I think there is a glitch in their system, as my second one said I got 3 wrong and when I looked back over the answers that it said I put....no way, so I took pictures of my last quiz..lol...I know pretty sad, but I don't mind taking a poor mark when I am not prepared or don't know the material, but my 76% should have been a 91%, but I'll accept it, and continue to take snapshots of my work! I've had phone calls coming in, and my husband was suppose to be gone for the day and he was back at 11, then my son home for lunch, it just seems like I am not suppose to be sitting working maybe?My girls are off for the week-end and my husband and son are going to Peterborough tomorrow, so I was so looking forward to having the house to myself for the day, maybe do some cleaning and my son called in a bind for childcare for my 3 year old grandson. I really at first felt like "are you kidding me?" I am feeling a bit stretched right now, and I know I was free to say no, but he's got lots on his plate and I do want to help, so I need to look at this as an opportunity to look at the day with a child's eyes and get outside and enjoy the day! The best thing that happened this week was my neice and nephew had their baby and I had the great honour of being their doula. It was such an amazing experience and it is how I envision the "perfect" birth to be, if there is such a thing. It did make me reflect and feel a bit sad for my daughter in law, who wanted to have such a birth and got right to the end of a difficult labour with no medication and on her terms, but for reasons beyond her control ended up having a C-section after pushing for 2 hours. She is such a strong women, very much like Jenna. I hope that if they have another child, that she feels she has an option for a VBAC and it would be such an honour to be present, however I will respect whatever choice she makes, she is amazing. However I am going to post Derek and Jenna's birth story I wrote the night I got home from the birth that I presented to the couple. It tells it much better than I can explain 2 days after the fact.

Derek and Jenna’s Birth Story-Laurel Abigail-May 18, 2011-1:59pm

When I got the call from Derek on the morning of Wednesday May 18, 2011, I was excited that things were happening for you both. Jenna, you had lost your mucous plug the day before, but knowing that can happen well before labour, I was pleasantly surprised that was not the case for you. So when I spoke with him around 7:00am as I was heading out the door, he said the midwife had just checked you, and you were 3cm dilated and 40% effaced and -2 station, which was a good start. Derek said that it could be 6-12 hours and not to come until maybe early afternoon. I was not comfortable leaving it that long, so we decided after rush hour I would head in. So just after 9:00am I left, and of course traffic was still pretty stacked up, so I arrived around 10:30am and you were already in the water. The midwife said you had gotten quite active and were 5cm, which was wonderful news. She did mention that the baby was OP and although you weren’t having terrible back pain like many people do, you were having a strong urge to push. You were working very hard with your contractions, and Derek and I focused on keeping you from pushing.  You blew and panted and occasionally pushed/grunted and we pulled you back to blowing. The midwife checked you around 11:15 and you were 6cm. So you went in the birth pool for a bit, and the premature urge to push was very challenging for you, but you worked through it. Changing your slow deep breathing and blowing out, to a faster patterned breathing and blowing which seemed to work better for you.  Your midwife discussed the saline injection, and you decided to try it. It would have involved 4 needles into your back of sterile water. I had not heard of it before, and I just asked her about side effects and benefits, and it seemed to be a safe, non-invasive option for you to try. Trying not to push when you have the urge is almost unbearable, but you worked so hard. She warned you that they sting, like bee stings going in, and the pain of that continues for a few minutes. She was right, it really stung, and after 2 of them, you said “enough already”! You got out of the tub and did some standing with your leg up on the sofa, in an attempt to get Laurel turned. This was pretty uncomfortable and it was about 10-15 minutes before you were back in the tub. It seemed to be the place you were most comfortable. You liked to be on your knees in a wide stance, leaning on the tub wall, even though your hips started to really ache. You really listened to your body and rocked back and forth naturally, helping the baby to turn. Your midwife was so helpful in getting you to change positions regularly. The urge to push continued and intensified. Derek had gone briefly to buy some Gatorade for you. There was a moment that you seemed to be overwhelmed, wondering if you could do this, and I had started suspecting you were further along than what would have been expected for a first time mother.  I took you by the shoulders and asked you to look at me. I told you that you were strong, a warrior. That most women don’t do this, because they don’t have the inner strength that you do. That you were almost there, and we were all there and were going to help you through this, and Derek had just come back, and reinforced this. Your moment of doubt passed so quickly as you refocused your efforts to get through one contraction at a time. Some contractions were coming one on top of the other, and then you would get the odd one that would be 4 or 5 minutes. Derek kept speaking to you about how far you’ve come and how strong you’ve been and encouraging you, and was so attentive to your needs both emotionally and physically. As you continued to fight the urge to push your midwife suggested she might be able to manually rotate the baby’s head into an anterior position. She talked to me about using Olive Oil on your back and encouraging the rotating from the outside while she tried to do this internally.  I was hopeful that you would be much further along at this exam, even though it had been less than 1 hour since you had last been checked. Your contractions were very close together, and the urge to push so strong, I felt certain that you were in transition. When she checked you, as soon as I saw the look on her face, I knew you were close, but this even exceeded my hopes! You only had an anterior rim. So she asked you about pushing the lip of cervix over the baby’s head with the next contraction, and you agreed and it was successful!  Back to the water for you! There was some discussion about towels and blankets for the baby, and when you were talking to Derek and called him “sweet pea” I had to smile. I commented that I had heard many women call their husbands names during labour, but nothing as nice as that before. You had a renewed sense of purpose now, knowing that you were on the home stretch and it seemed much better for you after that, you worked so hard with the contractions pushing. You pushed for 2 hours and went from knees to seated position for a bit. I told you if you wanted to reach down and feel the baby’s head and you wanted to. It seemed to really help you focus your pushing to feel it.  After about 90 minutes you were feeling that you weren’t making progress, you couldn’t feel her moving. Your midwife reinforced that it was a gradual process, that you were making progress. Derek kept encouraging you, and cheering you on which you responded to so well. She suggested the birthing stool in the water, and although you didn’t seem too keen at first to try it, once you were on it, you loved it. You really made great progress with it, and brought the edge of the baby’s head out, and used a mirror to see.  It was suggested that you go back into the water, since you were on the verge of giving birth the baby would need to be kept warm, submersed in the water, so you agreed and went off the stool into the water and in the next few contractions your midwife asked you to go to hands and knees, which I asked her about later and she said that if there were any problems getting the baby’s shoulders out, you would already be in position. So within the next few contractions you pushed the baby’s head out, and then her shoulders and the rest of her body slid out easily. You immediately turned over and took your baby in your arms and the joy and relief were easily read on your face. Both you and Derek were emotionally overcome with the joy and relief, and I’m sure there was not a dry eye in the house as we witnessed the birth of a family surrounded with love and peace. Laurel had a rather short umbilical cord and when ready Derek cut it and released her from the place she had been attached to you for the past 9 months. The placenta took another 10 minutes or so to come out, and you pushed it out smoothly. You stayed in the water for a while, and eventually the midwife asked if you would be ok to go to the sofa, so she could access your rate of bleeding. It didn’t seem like you were bleeding much, however after 20 or 30 minutes you mentioned the blood flow, and when checked you had a fair amount, and a large clot. It seemed to be a bit more then I was totally comfortable seeing and the midwife talked to you about an oxytocin injection, and you didn’t answer right away. I told you if you were my daughter I would want you to have it, and that I would not want to see you have to go to the hospital. To me it seemed like such a small intervention and it was after the birth, I was very relieved that you agreed you wanted to have it. It made you crampy and Derek took Laurel and sat in the rocking chair with some skin to skin contact, and bonded with his daughter while you squeezed my hand during the very painful massage they had to do on your uterus to try and work a blood clot out that she suspected was in there and causing you some trouble. It was successful and after you passed another large clot your bleeding got much lighter. Your midwife was so respectful and consultative throughout the entire labour and birth process. Always explaining and asking permission before proceeding with anything, it was such an atmosphere of empowerment and support that she provided. I am so impressed with the level of care and caring that I saw. What a great decision it was to have them as your caregiver, and possibly a stroke of luck that you got this one for your birth. After sharing this experience I do feel like you are like a daughter and Derek has always been more like a son than a nephew for me.  I am so proud of you and Derek. The level of commitment you both showed and Derek’s emotional support in the process were huge factors in the birth experience you had. Allowing me to be with you is such a gift. You have given me far more from this experience then I have given you. The trust it takes to allow someone to share in such a personal and life changing moment like this, is huge, and I don’t take that lightly.  I am so honoured to have been given your trust with this role and privileged to be a part of this time in your life. Sometimes in this life things are presented to us as a gift, a gift we didn’t even know we were missing until we received it. Thank you for your gift, my life is forever changed for the better because of you both.

Love (Aunty) Sandy